Dear So and So – The Body Edition

Dear So and So...

Dear Time Of The Month

It’s very kind of you to make sure you visit me every month, without fail. The thing is, and this is getting a bit awkward, you are kind of outstaying your welcome. 11 days a month? Really? For that length of time I’d expect someone to contribute towards the extra food that gets consumed during their stay.

You are becoming a real pain,

Thanks,

Her in agony!

*******

Dear Kieran,

“Mummy, put the Jive Bunny music back on, it ‘s REALLY funny when you dance to it”

I will remember that Son,

Mummy x

*****

Dear Teething Fairy

You were warned last week, pack the hell in tormenting my baby!

Watching you,

Her who hates her son being in pain

*****

Dear Doctor,

Thanks for the full breast exam, I’m glad there was nothing sinister in the end. I feel much reassured

Her with the *now* very sore boobs.

PS Thanks for warming your hands up though!

*****

Dear Always Ultra

These aren’t wings, they are barely wing-lets!

Seriously!

Her who is pee’d off!

********

Dear Self,

Stop being a plum, your smear is overdue,

Not cool,

Get it booked in for as soon as Time Of The Month buggers off.

From, Plumhead

******

Dear Self

Deciding to get new furniture, and totally rearrange the upstairs of your house with a teething baby, sore boobs and the Time Of The Month on an extended visit…… didn’t really think that through did you?

Doh!

***********

Dear Husband

Apologies, I suspect I may be being something of a cowbag, it’s the hormones you see.

I love you,

Wife xxxxxxxx

PS Help me rearrange and sort out upstairs (yes I know I said I wanted to do it myself) – it will make me much less snarly, honest 🙂

For The Girls – THAT Time Of The Month #TMI

Not a very happy bunny - Bluurgh!

Bloating, pain, headaches, bad skin, PMT (or general arsey-ness), insane hunger, tiredness…

Every month Mother Natures reminds me  that I am a woman, and since having kids, seems to do it in spectacular style too. I have very heavy & long periods, despite being on the pill (Thanks pcos!), and they really wear me down!

I’m guessing I’m not the only who feels utterly crap at this this time of the month, I can’t be, so how do you all survive???

I’m on WeightWatchers so chocolate is off the agenda and a foody binge does me no good either. I’m a busy mum (very busy mum!) which means no climbing under the bedclothes and waiting it out, oh, and I rarely drink, so drowning my sorrows is out too.

Lets have some sisterhood solidarity.. what do you do to get through THAT WEEK, what picks you up, cheers you up, what helps with the pain, how do you stop yourself from sliding into scummymummy-dom?

Come on ladies (pardon the pun), share with me your gems of period-surviving tips!

**A quick edit! Discussing this on Twitter, the Merina Coil has come up as a viable contraception option. Your experiences of the coil would be much appreciated!