Settling Family Disputes Without Ruining Relationships

family

Families can be extremely hard to deal with sometimes. I’m from a big family (I have three brothers and two sisters) and thankfully we all rub along really well. As adults now with out own families we are closer than ever. From talking to friends and so on though, our lack of family woes seems to be quite rare. As the old saying goes, “you can choose your friends but not your family”. That’s all well and good but sometimes forcing a relationship with family members you’re not fond of can be a mistake, as issues will come to the surface sooner rather than later.

Sometimes, a family dispute will start. Social conflict at some level is inevitable now and again, and of course, it will blossom or corruptly grow in the family structure you spend most of your time with. The method here isn’t to avoid this from happening. Sometimes, you simply can’t. When a disagreement occurs, no matter what it is, a clean and sensible solution is important to come to. In order to lessen the potential difficulties and relationship breakdowns, consider:

Impartiality

Settling whatever issue is harming the family in a place of pure impartiality can be very important, especially if it is a big issue rather than a small grumble. It might be that the dispute needs to take place within the guidance of family law solicitors, and even family therapy can be a massive help as far as this is concerned. Sometimes you simply need a final answer backed up legally. It might be that there are disputes over the meaning left in a passed relatives will. Family law solicitors are used to this sort of inquiry, and will often do everything they can to find the correct solution.

Proximity

Proximity to your family members can sometimes cause arguments. It depends on the situation. However, if you’ve noticed that you can’t even speak cordially with someone without some form of argument starting, it’s best to remove them from your home or situation, or for you to do the same. Seriously, we are all grown-ups. If you find that you cannot be around an uncle or sibling or whoever without it turning into arguments, stay away. Life is too short for arguments and nastiness. This leads nicely to my next point.

Civility

It’s important to be civil with your family no matter what. When all is said and done, they are still your blood. They might not be the people you most respect in this world, but that doesn’t mean the intensity of a familial relationship gives you, them or anybody the right to remain aggressive and stir the pot even more roughly. If you’re civil on your side, then you have removed at least 50% of the potential aggression from the situation. That’s good enough. It may be that you take the high road, but either way, keeping it polite is always the best idea, otherwise things get out of hand.

Families can be complex. If you find yourself at odds with a family member consider these points. Avoid Jeremy Kyle like screaming matches and trying and resolve things or not make things worse by remaining polite and keeping your distance. Life really is too short to spend it caught up in things that make us feel bad.

Our Future Finances

customers, finance futures

There is little more adult-like than starting to talk about pensions, putting things in place for our children’s futures and that sort of thing. Our future finances are something that we’ve been talking about recently because at the end of the day, one day our boys will be grown, we will be looking at retiring and we do want to spend our later years doing things that we want. Like everyone else, unless we start playing the lottery and win, we are going to have to find another way to fund our future bucket list or dream shopping list.

The beauty of the modern world is that you have options these days when it comes to arranging how your future finances will look. Here are just some of the things that you can look at doing in order to make sure you have pennies available for later in life.

Savings

We are diligent when it comes to savings. The first thing we do every month is put money into our pots before paying bills or anything else. I used to find that if I waited to see what was left at the end of the month before saving, that for whatever reason, there wouldn’t be anything left. Funny old thing that.

We split our savings so that we have rainy day savings, car/maintenance savings, future “don’t touch this” savings and so on.

Property

I know many people who are planning on using their property once their mortgages are paid off to work as a kind of pension for their future. I know others who plan on using their property some way to help them fund their retirement bucket list. I think this is a great way to maximise (and fund) the fun and mischief that you can get up to later on down the road. Having bought a house and paid it off, you have much more flexibility in how you will fund your future financial needs.

Pensions

Pensions are important. You can find out how much your state pension will likely look like by registering with HMRC and looking on your online tax account. There are numerous things that may affect how much state pension you will get. It isn’t likely to be enough to live on.

We have worked hard to maximise what we will get back from our pensions and the workplace pensions can be brilliant if you have the right provider and a decent employer. I am not employed, being a freelance copywriter and of course, therefore, don’t have a workplace pension. There are other private pensions available however so thankfully we’re covered.

Lottery Win

A substantial win on the National Lottery could very well cover our future finances in terms of allowing us to do what we want to do once we’ve retired. The thing is, I’m not one for gambling on my future and at £2 a line I’d rather put my pennies into savings.

Bucket List

What are our future finances for? We have big plans, small plans and of course, we want to be able to be comfortable when we are no longer working. Just some of our plans include travel, learning new skills and perhaps some smaller local projects that we’d love to have the time and money to help with, without compromising on paying our bills.

Your Future Finances: The Conclusion

While saving towards your future finances and looking for ways to fund your later years is nowhere near as exciting as spending your pennies on fun now, there’s a good chance that down the road that you will wish that you had. Think carefully about how you will manage later on, as tomorrow comes around quicker than we’d like, and get proper advice on how to manage your pensions, savings, property matters and more.

 

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