BC (before children), I had an extremely stressful job. I had responsibility for service users (adults with autism), and staff, worked ridiculously long, often unsociable hours. Don’t get me wrong, I loved my work. It was an opportunity to really make a difference but damn it was stressful! It was hard (almost impossible) not to take my work home, and after a few years that kind of pressure really does start to wear you down.
Now I am a Mummy. I have the best job in the world, the people I work with are the best imaginationable (ie my boys!), and workwise, I work for myself (ok the boss can be a bitch sometimes) but it’s not so bad. That said… it is still stressful! It’s just a different type of stress, it’s Mummy Stress!
- Are my boys well?
- Are my boys happy?
- Am I doing right by them?
- Is how we have chosen to raise them the best way, will they be the men I hope they will be?
- Am I doing what I can to meet my work goals?
- Will I be able to bring enough money in to continue to say at home and work?
It’s never ending. A Mummy’s / Daddy’s shift is 24hrs long and there are no scheduled breaks, no time when you can completely switch off.
It’s stressful sometimes, especially when you have other things going on around you. I wouldn’t swap my life for anything but it would be great every so often to have a change, a bit of complete “me” time, maybe a girlie day away with my sisters and mum, I’m thinking about cheap spa-breaks (I have to say pampering myself isn’t over high on the priority list – I’m lucky if I can get a quick shower with the door closed lol), or an all expenses paid day shopping somewhere nice with no rushing, buying stuff just for me (no uniform or kiddy shoe shopping).
Roy struggles for what to get me for my birthday so I am seriously tempted to ask for spa vouchers this year. I’m losing weight and by September I’m hoping to be nearer goal which means it’ll be time to start thinking about pampering and setting straight the rest of my body! Let me just say, eyebrows like a Russian shot-putter is not a good look! A bit of me time, where I can completely switch off (as long as I can ring home occasionally to check on everyone lol) is just what the stress-doctor ordered!
What about YOU?
What would you ask for if you could have a stress-reducing treat, how do you combat your Mummy/Daddy stress, either in a big way ie a day out or trip away, or in a small way like listening to music or reading. Do you have a guilty pleasure you utilise to wind down? What works for you? I’d love to know and I’m sure others would do. (You can casually leave your comment open for the other half to see…..).
I don’t get any me time I have severly neglected myself. I would like just a couple of hours away from it all to just sit and chill not have to be on my guard, worry about the kids. I think mine would be get a Pirates of the Caribbean film on feet up on the settee, coffee and chocolate and Johnny Depp heaven .
Ideally I would love to go and see the new POTC at the cinema but thats not possible.
Why a film, why not just curl up with Johnny Depp on the sofa? 🙂
He doesn’t quite float my boat but give me james Spader, or basically any of the fellas from Greys Anatomy.. hmm.
Can’t see Roy sponsoring THAT stress break!
A spa day would be perfect, but i’d settle for half a hour to just read!! We’re getting married in September so I’m actually having a rare whole day to myself when we go on my hen trip to London – we’re going to afternoon tea at the Dorchester Hotel and then to see Wicked the musical in the evening – I can’t wait!!
I’m going off you…..#(green eyed monster!). The last show I saw was at school and was Lord Of The Flies. Hmm, not quite the most relaxing or entertaining lol.
Seriously though, I hope you have a fantastic hen night/day!
It’s amazing, isn’t it, how stressful this Mummy job is. I worked being the nurse in charge of running a small unit for children with profound special health needs, and also issues like autism and other issues, and dealt with some very stressed and anxious parents, some very sick children, some very annoying doctor’s and other health and social care professionals, and it WAS stressful, but not like this. I’m currently typing this, feeling beyond guilty, as I drink a furtive cup of coffee, while my 1 and 4 year old watch Roary The Racing Car. We don’t get a break, at work, you walked away, even if you didn’t “forget” about it, or switch off totally, you at least had time away. As Mummy, like you say, we don’t get time off. I LOVE this, and as I watch friend of mine go through IVF number 3 to try and have their first child, and another friend whose baby has profound health needs, and is going to be in and out of hospital for a long while, I am grateful for my healthy, happy, (if non sleeping, well, the 1 year old) children, but sometimes, I would just like ONE day off! Selfish, I know, but I believe we do need time to refresh and relax in order to be good at this Mummy job.
Anyway, sorry, that was a coffee fuelled ramble.
My ideal treat would be a day where I get to lie in, with no disturbances, til about 9am, have my breakfast without sharing it, (and it would a be a proper breakfast, you know, Eggs Benedict, or Smoked Salmon on a cream cheese bagel, not a bowl of rice crispies shared with my one year old, with the odd half eaten piece of toast thrown in) then a trip to the hairdressers for a wash and blow dry. Then some shopping, even just window shopping, on my own, without having to worry about when to stop to eat, having to find toilets for those “Mum, I need a wee, RIGHT NOW! ” moments, and a leisurely lunch, whilst reading a book, in a non child eating place. Then a swim at the local health club, then home, in time to put my kids to bed.
My hubby, bless him, is good, and he does give me breaks, to go and get my hair done, or to go for a run, or a swim, or lunch/dinner with fellow Mummy friends, but when he comes home and tells me he’s just been to a Michelin star place, with his work colleagues where they all had a slap up lunch and that he’s been offered an all expenses paid week’s trip to Switzerland and his colleagues there are going to take him out to dinner and show him all the sights, and they finish work at 4pm each day, I do have a teeny urge to throw something at him!
We will survive, but those breaks, and a little time out, are much needed. I’m off now to shower, Zingzilla’s is on, which means I have precisely 15 minutes of peace…. bye….!!
LOL I could have written this. Damn, is it unethical to cut and paste in over the top of my post? This is exactly my point. They are great (the boys) and I am very grateful for them but every so often I’d love to be Nicki rather than Mummy 🙂
Cut and paste away! I don’t mind, I don’t think it’s unethical?
Lol, I was only joking – but seriously, it’s spot on.
I want the impossible. I want to have that moment of peace and solitude spontaneously. Right at theat point (usually some time between 4 and 5 pm).
I’d like to click my fingers, pause the world so that only I am able to move, have a cup of tea, wander around the charity shops, come home and press ‘play’ again!
Now a pause button would be ideal wouldn’t it! Then we could really switch off, have some “me” time, then come home, press play and know we hadn’t missed anything during the day.