Lady Garden… Smear Test Edition

Those who enjoyed my Lady Garden post might find this edition interesting.

Yesterday was my smear test. For me having the actual test doesn’t cause me any concern as after having two children after struggling with fertility issues I’m not convinced that there isn’t a health provider left in North Yorkshire that hasn’t seen my lady parts. No, for me the smear test provides a different concern…. what to do about the winter growler.

Now, obviously I had to do something as I couldn’t turn up un-trimmed. Really there should be an option to go and have a “Smear Test Tidy” the same way that you can go for a¬†Brazilian¬†wax or similar. That way there would be no confusion over what is the best style to go for. After agonising of the dilemma I went for “clean and tidy”. Going for respectable rather than slutty is the best way I feel for these things. Who knew that a similar but essential medical test could cause such topiary tension?

My advice is that the best style of front garden fashioning for appointments such a these has to be a style you are comfortable with. Do not however do what I did which was to spend so much time making sure my lady bits were presentable and my pedicure up to spec that I forgot to shave my legs. Yeti doesn’t come close… oh the shame! I’m concerned that I will have to turn up fully vajazzled next time to make up for this faux pas!

*Hopefully this will make you laugh but also remind you that joking aside, cervical testing is important. Find out more here and if you are due, make that appointment. My last smear test, as they’re known, took minutes and to be honest was over before I knew it had begun. Those few minutes are well worth the peace of mind of knowing I was all clear, just as they would have been if something had been found so that treatment could be arranged.

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2 comments / Add your comment below

  1. Well thank you for settling this question! Can I quote you next time me and my (older) female friends are discussing it? You’d better be right cos I have actually been putting off having a smear due to not knowing the answer to this question – the whole hair-free movement in the past ten years having completely passed me by as I had other things in my life that were more pressing. Until I saw all those hair-free women giving birth on OBEM….
    Looking for Blue Sky recently posted..Silent Sunday 17.2.13

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